Hello Blogging Universe,
It has been a long time, hasn't it? So much has happened. So much has changed. I seriously want to know what you're up to and how you've been!
So, what have you been up to?
Good! That's so great! It's good to hear that you're still doing the same ol stuff. I know exactly what you mean. It's so nice to have time to hang out on the weekends and do your own thing.
How's work?
Really? Nothing's changed there either, huh? Well, I'm so glad that you're still working there.
Painful isn't it? Wait. I don't think painful even begins to describe the feeling you get from small talk. Really. They should call it "Hang me by my toenails and drip water into my nostrils" talk.
I.
HATE.
SMALL.
TALK.
I have a friend who lives halfway across the world. We were roommates in college. We usually talk face-to-face once a year when she visits Texas and through email once every two months or so. The most refreshing thing about our friendship is that when we do talk, neither of us puts the other through that exhausting small talk. It's just like we saw each other this morning on our way to class, and the conversation immediately returns to that amazing living room they painted on Trading Spaces with the lime green stripes and purple polka dots.
It reminds me of being home. In a small town. Where you see everyone every day and small talk consists of reviewing the latest list of pregnant 7th graders. Oh! And did you hear? Mrs. Robertson was moved into the nursing home because they found her dog in her freezer!
On the other hand, I have a friend who lives in Dallas. He lives no more than a mile away from me. We see each other every 2 weeks or so. And we talk every other day online while I should be working - getting people drunk.
Sidebar: I work for an alcoholic beverage company.
On the times we get together (every 2 weeks or so), the conversation always begins like this:
"Girl, how are you???? Whatcha been up to???
BAH! You KNOW what I've been doing. I just told you YESTERDAY that I was walking my dog, cleaning my house and staying late at work for a meeting. We talk ALL THE TIME. Can't we just sit here, drink a beer and talk about stupid stuff? Like, I don't know, the fact that you once stuck our friend's perfume between your butt cheeks, took a picture and mailed the picture and the perfume to her?
Now that is awesome conversation.
-P
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4 comments:
Totally agree. Cut past the bullshit and get to the meat of the conversation.
Whenever anyone asks me what I've been up to, I immediately draw a blank. It's like, I haven't seen this person in 2 years, but I haven't done anyting since we've last seen each other? That can't be. So, I always lead off with "Oh, nothing much, just living I guess." Then, as the conversation progresses, I remember all the stuff I've done. I've broken up with a boyfriend, or gotten a new job, or moved to Hawaii. But, by the time I remember all that, we're past the small talk or, they've launched in to an extremely detailed account of how they've spent the past years, months, days, whatever, and I feel rude interrupting. "Oh, hey, that reminds me. I've actually done stuff too!"
Also, I feel that when I give such a vague response, it sounds like I don't care to share with the person what all has been going on. Sometimes, that's the case, but not always.
-NS
Well, it's ALWAYS the case for me. I never care to tell you about what I've "been up to."
What the heck does this mean, "What have you been up to?" anyway?
It's such a vague, stupid question. And no one really wants to hear your answer anyway. Let's face it. They don't care.
What they're really dying to ask is, "Hey, how's that raging case of gonorrhea?" or "I hear you're about to die of cancer. What's that like?"
And if that's the case, then I say ASK ME!
I agree. People don't want to know the good shit that's happened to you. They want to know about your misfortunes...because let's face it- we all love Schaudenfrede (spelling?)---we love it when bad things happen to good people. It's much more interesting then hearing about all of their stupid accomplishments. The juicy stuff that we are going to repeat to our friends is the BAD stuff.
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